This page is for all those of you with a less than abundant sense of mechanical sympathy. You know who you are, SHAME ON YOU!

Need a good place for an earthing point? Why not drill a hole in the bottom yoke pinch point!!! No please don't.

We noticed the handlebar clip on moved when the bike was pushed on a customer's race bike . The fork stanchion was loose in the bottom yoke. It was the stanchion turning, even though the pinch bolt had been done up by Charles Atlas.







Why struggle when a hammer is to hand? Honda CB750 four, gasket mating surfaces & fins mullered - by a hammer and chisel? It got worse inside, cam cradle threads completely stripped but still re-fitted.

“All old bikes leak don’t they?” Aaaargh







Yup it’s the same piston. The decapitation of Royal Enfield single due to no oil


Ducati 900SS, A  valve snapped off & hammered into the head.

S shaped valves from another Ducati, a 748 SP. Cam belt failure.

Change those belts regularly, Desmo owners.

This is what a Triumph T120 con rod looks like only 500 miles after a “professional” re-build.

Some people just shouldn’t go near the inside of an engine. The bike looked stunning from the outside.

If your BSA big single starts knocking; STOP, then get it recovered or push it home!

This one clearly didn’t do either until it seized solid!! More filings in the cases than a machine shop, ouch.

Ouch! A newly rebuilt 1977 Suzuki GT250, only done a careful 60 miles………..oops!







1976 Kawasaki H2 750 – Hydraulic lock and well bent con-rods, eek. Check your Jap classics’ Vacuum petrol taps at service time, and if it goes “clunk” when you try to start it, DON’T bump start it or this might happen! A triple whammy!!!!







This has to be one of our all time favourites! On servicing a Norton Commando, lo and behold, what did we find. Why use a box spanner and or a deep socket when a cold chisel will do the job? After splitting the nut, the previous owner then welded it up!!!

An outrageously dangerous bodge to save just £4.50 for a new nut.  


How not to replace and fit a soft link on a Honda CBX I000 this machine was being ridden around with this     time bomb fitted!



        We have just serviced a customer's Triumph T140E and low and behold . He had just purchased it and was told it had a full service three months prior by a Triumph expert, but our customer wanted ourselves to just give it a small service /checkover for peace of mind. We do not know how it did not sieze up! It was actually ridden in like this. We didn't even bother cleaning the strainer and just replaced it with a new one :) When giving your OIF Triumph/BSA an oil change always remove the oil tank plate and give the strainer a clean, don't be lazy!